Tuesday, February 06, 2007

WFMW - Meeting the Needs


The best relationship advice I can give is this: Read His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harley, both the husband and the wife. And then put his advice into practice.

It's no surprise - men and women have radically different priorities. However, for all our differences in priorities, most men and women want the same thing (other than great sex, sheesh...): satisfying, loving relationships. How can you experience a lifetime of love, fulfillment and intimacy in your marriage? By learning habits that meet the most important emotional needs of yourself and your spouse.

Ignorance often contributes to a couples failure to care for each other. Men tend to try to meet needs that they value and women do the same thing. But their needs are often very different, and they waste effort trying to meet the wrong needs.

The right needs are so strong that when they're not met in marriage, people are tempted to go outside marriage to satisfy them. But aside of the risk of affair, important emotional needs should be met for the sake of care itself. Marriage is a very special relationship. Promises are made to allow a spouse the exclusive right to meet some of these important needs. When they are unmet, it is unfair to the spouse who must go through life without ethical alternatives.

Dr. Harley describes the ten emotional needs of men and women. He helps to identify which are the most important to you and your spouse, helps you communicate them to each other and helps you learn to meet them.

Successful marriages require skill and effort - skill in caring for the one you promised to cherish throughout life and effort to keep going when it gets hard. Good intentions are not enough. His Needs, Her Needs was written to educate you in the care of your spouse. Once you have learned and applied its lessons throughout your marriage, your spouse will find you irresistible, a condition that's essential to a happy and successful marriage.

And if you are a bookaholic like me and if you read so much for pleasure, why not read something that really could improve your marriage as well as your mind? It will be well worth your time.

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