Friday, June 09, 2006

Why God Made Moms

BRILLIANT answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions. How strange that there is a lot of truth in it...

Why did God make mothers?
  1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
  2. Mostly to clean the house.
  3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

  1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
  2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring
  3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

  1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
  2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother & not some other mom?

  1. We're related
  2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

  1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
  2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
  3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?

  1. His last name.
  2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
  3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?

  1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
  2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
  3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?

  1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goofball.
  2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
  3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms & dads?

  1. Moms work at work and work at home & dads just go to work at work. (This one is my FAVORITE!)
  2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
  3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
  4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?

  1. Mothers don't do spare time.
  2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

  1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
  2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?

  1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
  2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
  3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

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Now I had someone ask my kids these same questions and here were their answers. A hearty thanks to John for his taking the kids for a while so that Mr. Right and I could have a coffee date they would have a chance to answer these questions without us around.

My daughter is almost 10; my son is lucky he made it to 6. No, the answers were not changed... at all.

Why did God make mothers?

D: Because he loves them very much.

S: To have babies.

How did God make mothers?

D: With his own hands.

S: He used his powers and put them down here.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

D: He took a little dust and made them, and then he put a heart in them.

S: Some skin and some bones and some eyeballs. (This one had me cracking up!)

Why did God give you your mother & not some other mom?

D: Because he knew that she was the perfect match - just for me.

S: So I could love on her.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

D: Just like me!

S: Playing.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?

D: Is he a Christian? Does he follow God's rules? Does he treat her good?

S: Find out if he was good or bad.

Why did your mom marry your dad?

D: He was a Christian; she loved him very much, and he loved her.

S: Because Dad looked handsome and she looked pretty.

Who's the boss at your house?

D: Mom and Dad

S: Mom and Dad

(Sha here: We've got them trained right!)

What's the difference between moms & dads?

D: Mom is a girl, and Dad is a boy; but they both love me.

S: Short hair and long hair. (I think we have some educating to do on this question...)

What does your mom do in her spare time?

D: She reads. She does laundry. She reads.

S: Lies in bed. (Sha here again: That would be at 11 PM at night to about oh, 5:30 the next morning. See, I have sooo much spare time to lie about...)

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

D: She doesn't need anything. She's perfect just the way she is. (Sha: Okay... That one made me cry it's so sweet.)

S: Just give her love.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?

D: Sometimes she needs to be more patient and let me finish my sentences. (YIKES!!!)

S: Make her play with me everyday after school. (I'm making more playdates with that boy. I'd better work on some of my Transformer moves...)

I'm really glad they answered these questions... it reminds me that I have so much to learn in motherhood and so much love to appreciate. Plus, now I have so much to think about in all that spare time...

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