Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Oh the Weather Outside is Frightful…

No, I mean it.

It’s downright scary. Horror movie frightening… Like The Shining, except no Jack Nicholson or haunted spirits. The only thing after you is a strong, warmth-killing wind, trying to suck the remotest particles of heat from you, killing all active brain cells that usually tell you to get your butt inside where the fire is warm and the food is on the table. Okay, so that is not just like The Shining, but that was a freak you out, chill you to the bone movie, so it kind of works...

It’s stinkin’ cold around here. We had this wonderful nice fall weather one day and the next thing you know, God made it as cold as my freezer. The deep freeze freezer… I’m telling you, it’s glacial around here!

I saw some penguins moving onto the fake lake this morning. They said the polar bears were right behind them, then they started all that cute penguin-y stuff, like sliding everywhere and pushing each other in the hole in the ice that they made.

Cold. Cold. Cold.

I’m thinking a trip south somewhere is in order. Where can I go with $1.96? That’s all I have left after Christmas shopping…

And I get no sympathy from anyone around here, except Mr. Right. He gives the proper “Awww” sounds, hugs me and hands me a nice warm cup of tea. Plus he lets me warm my cold feet on him. Reason #8596 to keep him!

What I usually hear from everyone is “Put some meat on them bones.” Humph…Men!

Puh-leaze. What are they – stupid? As if I want to get big just to stay warm. I mean that is why God made desk heaters, hot chocolate, fireplaces and down comforters!

The upside is that since it is going to turn into the Antarctic this week, we get to have pretty flurries to make it look as if the cold is going to be worthwhile. I find that I can handle the cold as long as it looks like it’s trying to be pretty outside. Otherwise, it is some trial to be endured until the thaw comes.

I hope all this wintriness means that we can have a white Christmas. For that, and a good sled ride, I can make it through the chilliness. Now you’re talking!

Pass those hand warmers, would ya? I got a hill to tackle.


Look out below!!!!

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