No Pain, No Loss
I love the reaction I get when I people that I have high cholesterol.
Almost every single person utters some variance of these words:
“You have high cholesterol? But you’re so thin! I thought it was…” At this moment they look around to make sure the coast is clear, hunker down and whisper in a loud stage voice, “just for fat people.”
This one statement is a misnomer for the cholesterol. It really doesn't matter what size you are. You could be 80 or 380 lbs. Okay, so I am sure that weight, amount of exercise and diet do play a part in this problem, but a lot of it comes from your genetic makeup.
Yes, it is something else for which you can blame your parents.
So very short? Blame your mom.
Need glasses? Dad’s fault.
High cholesterol? Joint contribution, equally guilty.
So there is no getting around this diagnosis for me. I’ve got it good. But fortunately for me, it is only my bad cholesterol (LDL) that is warbling on the line. The other ones (triglycerides and HDL) are at the right levels, not willing to ride the rollercoaster. For which I am grateful.
So because I refuse to get on the medicine for cholesterol because of all the side effects like muscle aches, abnormal liver function, allergic reactions, heartburn, dizziness, abdominal pain, constipation and decreased sexual desire to name a few (come on, I’ve enough problems as it is.
I don’t want to invite any of those symptoms willingly!), I am trying to control it by diet and exercise.
Exercise I’ve started… now to the other part. (The part that reminds me that I have no self-control.)
This week marks the beginning of the South Beach Diet. Not so much for weight (although my pants are too snug), but for health benefits.
There is only one problem with this situation:
Why is it that the moment you tell me I can’t have something – that becomes the very moment I want nothing else.
No bread for me – now all I can think about is sinking my teeth into some crispy outside, soft inside sour dough loaf or a heavily iced cinnamon roll. Heck, even a crouton would do.
No carrots, corn or potatoes – What I wouldn’t give for some creamy mashed potatoes and carrots and dip or a hot, buttery corn on the cob.
No rice, pasta or starchy foods – that rules out Chinese and Italian meals – my favorites!
Brussels sprouts and collar greens – I don’t even like them! But I want them… because I can’t have them.
And why is it that I eat the same type and amount of meal that happens to be on the SBD and I am still hungry at the end of the meal? It’s just crazy because I know I have enough food in me, but my stomach won’t listen. It thinks it is on the brink of starvation.
I’m telling you, I’m just not a diet person. I can make it the two weeks. I can.
Okay... After rereading what I just wrote, I am giving myself a big slap to the forehead! I am such a whiner! Enough complaining for me. I am going to go eat a fabulous salad and remind myself that at least I have food to eat and no serious illness that puts me on the brink of death. (Thank you God for all my blessings and forgive me for being such a spoiled brat.)
Sorry for the gripe-fest… I feel better now. I’m glad I got that off my chest; however, that is the one place that I don’t really want to lose anything. Oh, the irony of it all.
Almost every single person utters some variance of these words:
“You have high cholesterol? But you’re so thin! I thought it was…” At this moment they look around to make sure the coast is clear, hunker down and whisper in a loud stage voice, “just for fat people.”
This one statement is a misnomer for the cholesterol. It really doesn't matter what size you are. You could be 80 or 380 lbs. Okay, so I am sure that weight, amount of exercise and diet do play a part in this problem, but a lot of it comes from your genetic makeup.
Yes, it is something else for which you can blame your parents.
So very short? Blame your mom.
Need glasses? Dad’s fault.
High cholesterol? Joint contribution, equally guilty.
So there is no getting around this diagnosis for me. I’ve got it good. But fortunately for me, it is only my bad cholesterol (LDL) that is warbling on the line. The other ones (triglycerides and HDL) are at the right levels, not willing to ride the rollercoaster. For which I am grateful.
So because I refuse to get on the medicine for cholesterol because of all the side effects like muscle aches, abnormal liver function, allergic reactions, heartburn, dizziness, abdominal pain, constipation and decreased sexual desire to name a few (come on, I’ve enough problems as it is.
I don’t want to invite any of those symptoms willingly!), I am trying to control it by diet and exercise.
Exercise I’ve started… now to the other part. (The part that reminds me that I have no self-control.)
This week marks the beginning of the South Beach Diet. Not so much for weight (although my pants are too snug), but for health benefits.
There is only one problem with this situation:
Why is it that the moment you tell me I can’t have something – that becomes the very moment I want nothing else.
No bread for me – now all I can think about is sinking my teeth into some crispy outside, soft inside sour dough loaf or a heavily iced cinnamon roll. Heck, even a crouton would do.
No carrots, corn or potatoes – What I wouldn’t give for some creamy mashed potatoes and carrots and dip or a hot, buttery corn on the cob.
No rice, pasta or starchy foods – that rules out Chinese and Italian meals – my favorites!
Brussels sprouts and collar greens – I don’t even like them! But I want them… because I can’t have them.
And why is it that I eat the same type and amount of meal that happens to be on the SBD and I am still hungry at the end of the meal? It’s just crazy because I know I have enough food in me, but my stomach won’t listen. It thinks it is on the brink of starvation.
I’m telling you, I’m just not a diet person. I can make it the two weeks. I can.
Okay... After rereading what I just wrote, I am giving myself a big slap to the forehead! I am such a whiner! Enough complaining for me. I am going to go eat a fabulous salad and remind myself that at least I have food to eat and no serious illness that puts me on the brink of death. (Thank you God for all my blessings and forgive me for being such a spoiled brat.)
Sorry for the gripe-fest… I feel better now. I’m glad I got that off my chest; however, that is the one place that I don’t really want to lose anything. Oh, the irony of it all.
Labels: Humor
posted by Shalee at 12:56 PM
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